A Cloudy Enigma, a poem

I wake up with a vision as strong as a plane flying through the clouds above
Dusty, flying through uncharted territory
My throat tightens; my eyes water
Tears become the enemy as they drip down my face
I never know when this feeling will come
I can’t sleep; insomnia becomes me
I am paralyzed with fear, a fear that consumes me daily

I know not the difference between reality and illusion
Happiness is in a distant past, hidden from the dark present
What I want, I cannot have
And, what I have, I cannot want
An enigma is what I have become; an ode to my heart and brain

My body reacts; my mind hides, knowing the fight is over
Utopia doesn’t exist, but when I close my eyes, I see what could have been
My perception of reality has become an untruth, a lie, a fabrication

Behold, the girl who wakes up on clouds, drifting through the air
While the rest of the world stands still
Behold, the girl who cries for help
While the rest of the world stands still
Endings have never existed for me
Only continuations of doom and gloom, beginnings of new madnesses

And, so, it will continue to be a cloudy day, until it is no longer cloudy
Until the sky turns light blue like the ocean, my tears will come from the sea

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